Let Go of People Who Are Not for You — Release Them With Love

The good Lord has been in your corner the entire time.

• A Season of Healing & Restoration

There comes a time in life when you have to let go of people who are not for you—not because you hate them, but because you realize that holding on is preventing you from moving forward.

This is a very heartfelt message and something the good Lord has installed within my spirit for a very long time. It comes from previous experiences I have faced throughout my own life journey, and it ties into my previous message about family betrayal and finding healing.

For many of us, there comes a season when healing becomes necessary.

Notice how wounds go through a process. They’re fresh at first, and the hurt can feel unbearable. As days go by, you may still feel the pain from time to time. The wound begins to close, the scar forms, and slowly fades as new skin repairs itself.

That’s how healing takes place along with transformation.

Maybe you’ve recently experienced betrayal, rejection, disappointment, or the loss of a relationship you thought would last forever. If you’re going through something like that right now, I want you to remember something: the good Lord has been in your corner the entire time.

Think about a boxer in the ring. Between rounds, he goes back to his corner, where his trainer is waiting for him. The trainer watches, encourages him, gives him instruction, and prepares him for the next round. That’s how I see God. He has been in your corner since day one. He knew you before you came into this world. He knew you before the foundations of the world and before the existence of the universe He created.

So when you’re going through betrayal, rejection, confusion, or loneliness, remember that God sees what other people cannot see. People may only see the surface of your life. They may see you through a photograph, a video, a conversation, or a social media post, but they don’t see everything happening behind the scenes. God does. He sees the nights you cried, the countless calls you made to the people you loved, the relationships you tried to preserve, and the moments when you were confused and didn’t understand why someone was treating you the way they were. He sees things you may never see.

The tricks & manipulation have been brought to light, though.

• Betrayal Can become a season of Training & Spiritual Growth

One of the hardest things you can experience in life is betrayal. I’ve learned that sometimes what feels like rejection can eventually become a lesson and even a blessing.

The more you follow God, the more you may realize that your journey isn’t necessarily going to become easier. Sometimes, it becomes heavier. Jesus said in John 15:18, “If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.”

Following God means learning to live in this world without becoming consumed by the things that oppose God’s nature. I’m not talking about everyday things like going to the movies, going out to eat, enjoying hobbies, or simply living life. I’m talking about things such as lying, gossiping, backbiting, stealing, scamming, manipulating people, and intentionally hurting others. These things are contrary to God’s nature.

The Rubik’s Cube Concept

Psychological mind games are like this.

The tricks & manipulation have been brought to light, though.

We can’t forget that God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.

AND IT’S A SHAME, because the same peace and life that the good Lord gives us daily, along with His mercy and grace, can sometimes be overshadowed when we allow things like gossip, hate, jealousy, and strife to take root toward our neighbors.

AND THIS HAS BEEN HAPPENING FOR YEARS UPON YEARS, and somewhere along the way, we can lose sight of our human spirit and conscience that naturally point us toward good morals.

Eventually, we begin to reap the consequences of things that are opposite of God’s nature. That’s life.

Deep down, we know the real us, but sometimes the desire to fit in with the crowd, be accepted, gossip with others, or tear each other down can pull us away from who we are meant to be.

Then, when it’s all said and done, and we go home at the end of the day…

…does it weigh on our conscience?

Does it remind us of the person we truly want to become?

You’ll notice subtle behaviors in their actions, such as manipulation. This is one trait of a controlling person or someone who always wants things their way.

They’ll use manipulative tactics to try to win others over or gain control of a certain individual. This can cause emotional distress, especially to those who genuinely love them.

How do you respond to their manipulation? It’s simple: you don’t play their game. You walk away without feeling any pity.

They will have to learn on their own. Some people may never choose to change, and there are some who will choose to change, become aware of their behaviors, and decide to work on themselves.

Just know you did your part, and you did the right thing by leaving for your own well-being.

Sometimes God uses difficult experiences to separate you from environments and relationships that are no longer good for you. That separation may hurt, but it can also become a training season. Use it to increase your faith, strengthen your spirit, develop your character, and, most importantly, develop your discernment.

When you finally see the pattern, you no longer have to keep rearranging the pieces. You can just simply let go. Release the situation you’re going through, release the person in love, and allow God to handle what you cannot control. In His right timing, He will handle the rest. You’ll soon realize that the final piece will eventually become solved by letting go.

Words matter, but actions reveal character.

• God Is Not the Author of Confusion, but of Peace

There is another scripture that stands out to me: “For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace.” — 1 Corinthians 14:33.

If a relationship constantly produces confusion, manipulation, dishonesty, and emotional chaos, you have to pay attention. Patterns matter. If someone repeatedly says they’re going to call you but never does, repeatedly promises one thing but does another, or repeatedly tells you they love you while their actions communicate something completely different, you have to pay attention.

Words matter, but actions reveal character. That’s why discernment is so important. Ask God to increase your discernment so you can recognize what is truly healthy for your life and what isn’t. Sometimes the answer isn’t to keep fighting for the relationship. Sometimes the answer is simply to let go.

Sometimes following God means releasing people you desperately wanted to keep. And yes, it hurts.

• It’s Time to Cut the Cord

There are moments when you have to cut the cord. It may be a close friend, someone from your past, a relative, or even a family member. And I know that can be extremely painful.

Maybe you had a friend you grew up with. Maybe you’ve known each other for years. Maybe you’ve shared countless memories. Maybe you thought this person would always be in your life. But history alone doesn’t mean someone is meant to remain in your future.

Jesus said in Luke 14:26–27, “If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.” Jesus was emphasizing that our commitment to following Him must come before every earthly relationship.

Sometimes following God means releasing people you desperately wanted to keep. And yes, it hurts. But God is also a God of healing, restoration, purification, and order. So don’t look at every separation as rejection. Sometimes separation is protection. Sometimes distance is necessary for healing. Sometimes letting go is how you make room for what God is trying to bring into your life.

Take your time, watch the patterns, and pray about it.

• Know People by Their Fruits

People can say anything. They can say they love God, say they love you, say they’ve changed, or say they want to reconnect. But Jesus taught us to recognize people by their fruits.

Look at the fruit. Look at their character, their consistency, how they treat people, and whether their actions match their words. That’s where discernment comes in.

You may even have people from your past suddenly return to your life. They may ask how you’ve been, tell you that you’ve been doing great things, and suggest that you reconnect. Maybe they genuinely mean it. But don’t allow nostalgia to override discernment. Take your time, watch the patterns, and pray about it. If someone has repeatedly shown you through their actions that they are not healthy for your life, don’t ignore what you’ve already learned simply because they have returned.

Sometimes you simply have to say, ‘I love you, but I can no longer continue this relationship in the same way.

• Release Them With Love

This is where the heart of the message comes in: Let go of people who are not for you. Release them with love.

You don’t have to hate someone to let them go. You don’t have to wish evil upon them. You don’t have to spend the rest of your life trying to prove that they hurt you, and you don’t have to carry resentment.

Sometimes you simply have to say, “I love you, but I can no longer continue this relationship in the same way.” That’s not hatred. That’s a boundary. That’s maturity. That’s recognizing that peace has value.

Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for yourself—and even for another person—is to step away. You can love someone and still walk away. You can forgive someone and still maintain your boundaries. You can wish someone well and still choose peace.

• Don’t Let Betrayal Change Who You Are

When someone hurts you, it’s easy to become bitter. But don’t allow someone else’s behavior to turn you into someone you’re not. Let the experience develop you instead. Let it increase your faith, strengthen your character, teach you discernment, and show you what you will and will not tolerate moving forward.

The fruits of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—should continue to grow within you. The goal isn’t to become bitter because someone hurt you. The goal is to become wiser without losing your love. That’s the difference.

Continue walking in love. Continue walking in truth. Continue walking in peace. And continue allowing God to shape your character.

Do something that brings you joy.

• Don’t Forget to Live

While you’re going through all of this, don’t forget to live. Don’t constantly beat yourself over the head. Take yourself out to eat, go to the movies, take a walk, enjoy nature, work on your hobbies, make a film, take photographs, and do something that brings you joy.

You don’t always need someone beside you to experience life. Sometimes you need to become comfortable being with yourself.

I’m naturally an introvert. It’s not that I hate being around people. I’ve simply learned that I can become more focused when I’m alone. And if you’re naturally quiet, shy, or introverted, don’t beat yourself over the head because of that. God knows your personality because He created you. You don’t have to become somebody else to be loved by Him.

We’re blessed to experience laughter, sadness, joy, love, and even pain.

• We Are Blessed to be able to witness the human experience

We’re blessed to be here. We’re blessed to be human. We’re blessed to breathe and to feel. We’re blessed to experience laughter, sadness, joy, love, and even pain.

Betrayal is painful, but these emotional experiences are also part of being human. Sometimes God uses these experiences to develop us into stronger, wiser, and more compassionate people.

So thank God every day. It shouldn’t take one particular holiday for us to stop and recognize the gift of life. God gives us breath, another day, and another opportunity to grow each day.

Sometimes there is a fire inside you—a word that you have to speak, a message that you have to release. That’s how I feel about this message. It reminds me of God’s prophet Jeremiah, who stated:

“But if I say I’ll never mention the Lord

or speak in his name,

his word burns in my heart like a fire.

It’s like a fire in my bones!

I am worn out trying to hold it in!

I can’t do it!”

So if you’re currently going through betrayal, rejection, or the loss of a relationship, remember this: Don’t confuse separation with failure. Don’t confuse rejection with your worth. Don’t allow betrayal to make you bitter. Let the experience teach you. Let God heal you. Let your discernment grow.

And when the time comes to let someone go, release them with love. You don’t have to carry hatred for someone simply because they are no longer part of your journey.

Sometimes letting go isn’t the end of your story. Sometimes it’s the beginning of a completely new chapter.

The storm you just came out of was only meant to prepare you for the next level. This season was meant to happen. Your spirit became exhausted, but comfort was with you the whole time.

• Just because something doesn’t work out right now doesn’t mean something else will not work out later

There could be a reason behind it. Possibly, that certain thing doesn’t align with the path you’re currently on. Life always has a way of keeping things in motion, and eventually, the right time will come when what didn’t go as expected finally works out.

God bless you all. Keep walking, keep growing, keep your faith, and above all, keep your peace. 🤍

- Rob